


how do you solve a problem like Sherlock?

by not_the_marimba



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen, M/M, bad movie musicals for everyone, now I just want to watch South Pacific all the time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-04
Updated: 2011-08-04
Packaged: 2017-10-22 04:59:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/234061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/not_the_marimba/pseuds/not_the_marimba
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Filled for a prompt from wrabbit at fic_promptly: "Sherlock (BBC), John/Lestrade, Lestrade and John watch musicals to annoy Sherlock. It backfires when Sherlock memorizes the lyrics and won't stop singing because they're stuck in his head."</p>
            </blockquote>





	how do you solve a problem like Sherlock?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wrabbit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrabbit/gifts).



"So, what're we watching tonight?"

 _We?_ Lestrade mouths across the living room to John.

"Yes. _We_. Us. You. Me. John." Sherlock shifts on the couch, laying his head on the armrest.

 _I thought you were going to talk to him about--_

"Talk to me about what, Lestrade?"

"Sherlock." John leans back and crosses his legs. "We, er. Lestrade and I. Have been discussing the fact that, we'd... like a bit more alone time. By ourselves."

"Is this about Tuesday? I thought we covered this, I didn't mean to walk in. You two are so vain, honestly. Now. What are we watching?"

"We... are watching... a documentary... about... bonobos." John knows it's a total shot in the dark, but he's not sure he can take another night of trying to just spend a bit of quiet time with Lestrade being ruined by Sherlock explaining every detail of whatever they're watching and why it's wrong.

"Excellent. Bonobo social relations are remarkably like those of humans." Sherlock looks so excited that John would swear he just smiled a bit.

" _Indiana Jones_. We're going to have a marathon. Actually." Lestrade's picked up on it now.

"Those films are remarkably off-base. A strikingly misleading portrayal of the discipline of archaeology. For example, when--"

" _Sound of Music_!" John says, a good deal louder than he'd intended to. "We are actually going to watch _The Sound of Music_."

"Is that a documentary?" Sherlock asks, lifting his head off the armrest.

"No. It's a musical. There's singing. And dancing. All the time. For no reason. Nothing anyone does really makes any sense." Lestrade is speaking suspiciously quickly. "There's a nun. She sings. She goes and meets children. They sing. Everyone. Everyone sings."

Sherlock sits up. "Well. I did tell Mrs. Hudson I would go downstairs to help her get her china down from the shelf. At some point. I suppose this could happen while you two watch your musical."

"We'll miss you dreadfully," Lestrade shouts after Sherlock as he gathers his robe about him and descends down the stairs. "What are we actually watching?"

" _The Sound of Music_."

"I thought that was a bluff?"

"Maybe I like that movie."

"...how long is it, again?"

"It's a little under three hours of Sherlock not watching us."

"Well, when you put it like that."

_______

On Thursday, Lestrade brings over _West Side Story_ , and Sherlock goes to check up on some kneecaps at Bart's. Saturday is _Fiddler on the Roof_ while Sherlock consults the homeless network. Wednesday, after an extended argument in which Lestrade insists that he will not be subjected to the indignities of watching _Hairspray_ ("If you really are that dead-set against it, but it really is quite cute, dear, I really do think you'd like it"), _South Pacific_ is agreed upon as a sensible choice ("It's Rodgers and Hammerstein, John").

They only make it as far as "Bali Ha'i" before four things happen: 1) Lestrade decides John's mouth is much more interesting than anything Rodgers and Hammerstein have ever written, 2) John decides taking off Lestrade's shirt is much more interesting than anything Rodgers and Hammerstein have ever written, 3) John realizes a few buttons down that he doesn't know where Sherlock has gone for the evening, and then he realizes that 4) Sherlock is standing right over the couch, glaring down at them.

"Sherlock! Shit. Shit. What are you doing?" John scrambles to the other end of the sofa as Lestrade frantically readjusts his collar. "We were just watching--"

"Spare me." Sherlock's gloves come off, swiftly followed by his scarf. "You think I wouldn't deduce it? The two of you, watching a musical every other night? Idiots. Move over, Lestrade. I want to see what happens with Nellie and Emile."

_____________

John's still annoyed about what Lestrade has come to refer to as the " _South Pacific_ walk-in" until six days later, when he wakes in the middle of the night to hear a rather familiar baritone singing "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair", and he is able to go back to sleep feeling somewhat vindicated.


End file.
